To the Woman Who’s Had an Abortion


I can’t pretend to know the guilt you live with everyday.  How you agonized over the decision as you drove to the doctor’s office. The guilt you may face every Mother’s Day passing wondering what your child would have become. The guilt that pains your heart every time someone calls you a murderer.

I won’t pretend to know the grief you endure even if it was your decision.

I won’t justify one circumstance over another that brought that decision into your life.

The questions you must ask yourself. How undeserving you might feel over the children you have now. Perhaps you’re dealing with infertility years later and might ask, “Did I cause this aching?”

To the woman who sat in the doctor’s office and was given two options: your life or your child’s…I am sorry.

How you might feel so far away from God or don’t feel worthy to have a relationship with Him because of condemnation and shame.

I’ve never had to lace up the shoes of the girl or woman who decided to have an abortion, but I have walked more than a mile in my own sin, shame, and brokenness. I’ve made decisions that caused guilt and grief in my heart that I live with every day. 

Abortion doesn’t personally align with my faith and beliefs which means I won’t have an abortion. Even in that, I’ve learned to never say never because I believe one can truly not know what they would do until they are the one having to make any decision.

My faith and beliefs align with Jesus.

Jesus met a woman at a well, told her everything she ever did, and forgave her.

Jesus met a woman caught in adultery, told her to sin no more, and forgave her.

Jesus let an immoral woman’s tears fall on His feet, reminded her that her sins were many, and forgave her.

I don’t know half of what I think I know about this fallen and broken world we live in, but I know the One who loved it so much that He gave His only Son. My faith and beliefs tell me there was forgiveness for those we read about in scripture, for me in my brokenness and sin, and for you.

To the woman who’s had an abortion and might be having a hard time amongst all the opinions of other broken people, let me be a voice reminding you of God’s mercy, everlasting love, and forgiveness. Let me be a voice speaking God’s grace over you. A grace that covers our sins and a grace that carries us as we endure this life filled with so much brokenness yet so much beauty as it all somehow works together. Let me be a voice reminding you there’s room at the Cross.

To the woman who just might be struggling as Mother’s Day approaches, don’t struggle in silence. Your grief is valid and God wants to heal you. Come to Jesus and finding healing in His scars.

Here are some resources I found that might help you as you continue to move foward:

  • The Grief Recovery Handbook - “The Grief Recovery Handbook” is designed to allow each griever to adapt its tools to their particular loss and the feelings of emotional pain that loss has generated in them. It’s a step by step approach to understanding, not only the specific impact of their pain, but also how to take positive action to release it and move beyond its control over their lives. (Source: The Grief Recovery Method)

  • Surrendering the Secret - This powerful, redemptive study helps each hurting woman find her personal path to healing. (Source: The Bible App)